Competition is everywhere—at school, in the workplace, in social circles, and even within ourselves. It can be motivating, pushing us to achieve and grow. But for many, competition can also become overwhelming, feeding anxiety, perfectionism, and self-doubt and effects self-esteem.
The positive effect of how competition affects self-esteem
For some individuals, competition is a natural driver. It inspires them to do better, to push themselves beyond their limits, and to take pride in their accomplishments. In a healthy environment, competition can:
Enhance motivation and productivity
Provide a sense of achievement
Foster resilience and perseverance
Some people thrive in structured, competitive settings, such as academic environments or professional fields where high performance is rewarded. When balanced, this can lead to a fulfilling sense of purpose and progress.
The negative effect of how competition affects self-esteem
However, for others, competition can be detrimental. If we constantly feel like we must outperform others to be valued, it can erode our self-esteem and create a cycle of stress and self-criticism.
In highly competitive environments, individuals may experience:
Fear of failure and rejection
Increased self-doubt and imposter syndrome
Reluctance to share ideas due to fear of criticism or being undermined
This is particularly common in workplaces where success is measured by comparison, rather than individual growth. When competition becomes toxic, it can lead to burnout, anxiety, and an overwhelming sense of not being “good enough.”
The Role of Self-Perception in Competition
Not everyone experiences competition in the same way. Our past experiences shape how we view success and failure.
For example, those who struggled with competition in childhood—whether in academics, sports, or social settings—may carry those feelings into adulthood. If being “the best” was always out of reach, it can impact how we set goals and measure self-worth later in life.
Finding a Healthy Balance
So how can we navigate competition without it negatively impacting our mental well-being? Here are a few CBT-based strategies:
Shift the Focus to Personal Growth – Instead of comparing yourself to others, compare yourself to past versions of yourself. What progress have you made?
Challenge Negative Self-Talk – Notice thoughts like “I’m not good enough” or “I’ll never measure up” and replace them with more balanced perspectives.
Set Meaningful Goals – Identify what truly matters to you, rather than competing for things that don’t align with your values.
Recognise External Pressures – Sometimes competition is imposed by societal or workplace norms. Remind yourself that you don’t have to conform to unhealthy standards.
Practice Self-Compassion – Many of my clients struggle with this idea. How about thinking in terms of are you being fair to yourself, especially in moments of self-doubt. Perfection isn’t necessary for success or self-worth. Again, another idea that my clients struggle with! But it is possible to adjust to extreme high standards into something that is achievable and you can feel proud of.
Conclusion
Competition isn’t inherently good or bad—it depends on how we engage with it. If it’s fostering growth and motivation, it can be a positive force. But if it’s leading to anxiety, burnout, or self-criticism, it may be time to reassess its role in your life.
If you find yourself struggling with self-esteem, anxiety, or perfectionism related to competition, therapy can help you explore these feelings and develop healthier coping mechanisms. You don’t have to navigate it alone.
I would like to invite you to sign up to my Self-Esteem Hub here
There are regular articles, podcasts about everything to do with Self-Esteem, anxiety and the art of being human! You can chat to me as well using the chat facility.
Thank you for reading.
Telephone : 07754 368541
email: mail@janewatkinscbt.co.uk
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